"There are five boxes to use in the defense of Liberty: The Soap Box, the Mail Box, the Ballot Box, the Jury Box, and the Ammunition Box. Please use them in that order."

We recently noticed this news item where a couple of little girls in Georgia were forced by the chief of police to shut down their lemonade stand because they didn’t have the necessary permits. Three permits totaling $150 for one day of operation, to be exact.

This sort of nanny-state Gestapoism is not just ridiculous. It is an affront to liberty which should outrage us all.

But it does serve to provide us with not just fodder to write about, but it also a reason to revisit an older post from one of our contributors, revise it, and update it:

  • If life gives you lemons, a socialist would say: “You have lemons? Well, a strong Government hand is needed to distribute the lemons more equitably. The Government needs to ensure that other people have lemons, too. Now, you may have to give up some of your lemons so that other people can have some, but it’s not fair that you have all these lemons and other people might not have any.”
  • If life gives you lemons, a communist would say: “Those lemons are the property of the State. If you did not get your lemons from the state — and since you have a whole bagful and are not a member of the ruling elite I know you did not — then you must surrender your lemons to the State, then stand in line so that you may receive a sliver of dried out rotten lemon six months from now.”
  • If life gives you lemons, a communitarian would say: “It’s great that you have lemons. And you should be able to do anything you want to with those lemons. But we’re going to tell you how you can use them and how you can’t use them. We’re also going to regulate the usage of them to make sure that they’re all used for the common good. And if you make too much money on them, we’ll tax you. For the common good.”
  • If life gives you lemons, every politician will say: “Tell you what I’m going to do for you. I’m going to take half of your lemons and in return I’m going to give you half a packet of sugar so that you can make a sip of lemonade with it.”
  • If life gives you lemons, a Democrat would say: “That’s too bad that you have lemons but no sugar or water or cups. I’m going to end tax breaks for big oil and corporate jet owners and then I’ll pass a law that gives you money for sugar and water and cups. I won’t check in to make sure you use it for those things. I trust you. Vote for me!”
  • If life gives you lemons, a Republican would say: “That’s great that you have lemons! Do you have any sugar and water and cups? No? Well I’ll pass a law to give you a tax break so that you can use the extra money to buy sugar and water and cups. I won’t check in to make sure you use it for those things. I trust you. Vote for me!”
  • If life gives you lemons, a Libertarian would say: “That’s great that you have lemons. I don’t care what you do with them so long as you don’t squeeze lemon juice in my eye. No sugar, no water, no cups? Not my problem.”
  • If life gives you lemons, a welfare recipient would say, “Why did you get lemons and I didn’t?! That’s not fair! I’m gonna vote for someone who is gonna make sure that I get my fair share of lemons for free!”
  • If life gives you lemons, a capitalist would say, “You have lemons? You should start a lemonade business! You don’t have sugar or water or cups? For a 25% stake in your company, I’ll invest.”

And finally: If life gives you lemons and you choose to set up a lemonade stand in Midway, Georgia, the chief of police will say: “Where are your permits, little girl?”


More articles in Featured Column, Op-Ed  | 

Similar Posts:

    None Found

Comments (1)

While most sites are playing the Commandant’s birthday message, posting some sort of link to a motivational video on YouTube, or writing a missive about the history of the Corps, today I decided to instead share one of my favorite Marine Corps jokes:

On the evening of November 10th, 1775, a guy walks into Tun Tavern, in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, for his nightly tankard of ale. He notices a couple gents setting up a table, and walks over to them.

“What’re ya doin’ here?” he asked.

“Oh, we’re recruitin for a new outfit called the Marine Corps,” one said. “We just formed it today,” said the other.

“Marine Corps, eh? What’s that?”

“Well, we aim to put Marines on ships as seaborne warriors. In addition to fighting ship-to-ship battles, the Marines will also be tasked with conducting amphibious operations… raids for provisions and such. You want to sign up?” asked the Marines’ first recruiter.

“Well, sounds interesting. What’s in it for me?”

“Sign up today and you get a free tankard of ale,” the recruiter said.

“A free tankard? Okay, sure, I’ll sign up.” So the man signed up, collected his free tankard of ale, and went to sit at a table reserved for new recruits.

He sat there for a while, drinking his ale, and another guy walks over with two tankards of ale and sits down.

“Where’d you get those two tankards of ale?” asks the first recruit.

“I signed up for the Marine Corps,” says the second. “They were giving out two free tankards for anyone who would sign up.”

The first looks at his near-empty tankard and says, “Wasn’t like that in the Old Corps.”

Semper Fidelis, brothers. And happy birthday.


More articles in Op-Ed  | 

Similar Posts:

    None Found

Comments (1)

Oh, politicians, environmentalists, and their choo-choo trains.

Over in the New York Times, Jason Plautz of Greenwire tries to compare Obama’s bullet train to Eisenhower’s push for an interstate highway system.

The piece quotes Federal Railroad Administration chief Joe Szabo as saying, “In the 20th century, our vision led to the Interstate Highway System. In the 21st century, our vision will give us a world-class network of high-speed passenger rail corridors.”

The article goes on to hit all the normal buttons: how trains will help us reduce our dependence on oil and cut carbon emissions; how it would put people to work; and how it would boost commerce and improve the economy. It also draws all sorts of parallels between the interstate highway systems beginnings and Obama’s work in trying to get high speed rail started. For example, the article talks about how Eisenhower was “amazed” at the autobahn and then goes on to quote Obama’s speech where he talks about how great high-speed rail and public transportation is in other countries and how we don’t have it here.

Jason, Joe, and Barry, we have some news for you: Railroads are not highways. And Ike didn’t push for an interstate highway system because of jobs or commerce.

(more…)


More articles in Op-Ed  | 

Similar Posts:

    None Found

Comments (0)

Recent Articles


Editor's Picks

Follow us on Twitter

Subscribe via Email


 


 Subscribe via RSS


Search Articles



Get Involved

powered by Congress.org
Find Elected Officials
Enter ZIP Code:

or Search by State



See Issues & Action
Select An Issue Area:




Contact The Media
Enter ZIP Code:

or Search by State




Get The Gear



© 2007-2012 fiveboxes.com Email the Publisher